Turning Heartbreak & Betrayal Into Lemonade, My Open Letter To Beyonce. . .

You have sung my life. For years you knew everything I was going through and helped me heal. . .at least for the moment.  I relate to you in a way I cannot relate to my best friend.  I too, am in love with a man who cheats.  I too, have stayed. I loved him too much, yet somehow, it was never enough.

I’ve packed his shit with “Irreplaceable” blasting in the background.  I’ve smashed his car with a softball bat while “Lost Yo Mind” was in the distance. “Resentment” was on repeat for weeks and I felt every single word and found myself overcome with emotion. “Poison” stung, I knew he was my poison, I knew he wasn’t good for me, but I kept coming back, wanting more.  I justified staying with “Ring The Alarm” because there was no way in hell I was going to let any other bitch have him.  Not on my watch, not when I have invested years of my life into this man.  I was also, “Crazy In Love” with him.  With each album you released, I listened to you sing the story of my life.

I have spent over 10 years with a man who loves me in the best way, the only way, he knows how to love, but he cheats.  He is irretrievably broken.  He is incapable of real love, Continue reading “Turning Heartbreak & Betrayal Into Lemonade, My Open Letter To Beyonce. . .”

 

To My Homewrecker, My Ex-Husband

To my home wrecker , my ex-husband. They say people cheat because they are missing something at home, physical affection , sexual gratification , mental connection / understanding , well what was your excuse? Because even though we had more than 1 handful of children to raise ( your’s from you previous relationship’s and mine from my previous relationship and our’s ) I always found time to be the loving supportive wife and mother to you all , I was exhausted most nights after you would go to work at midday and not come home until your shift ended around 11pm.

Weekdays were filled with our children coming home from school and the normal routines home work , afternoon tea , play time , bath time , dinner time , bed time , then making sure you ate when you came home from work and when you were in the mood satisfying you in bed before sleep. We Continue reading “To My Homewrecker, My Ex-Husband”

 

My Father’s Betrayal

The following was copied from my daughters post today. It broke my heart to read. How can the man who was supposed to love and protect her continue to hurt her every chance he gets.

Daughters Facebook Post

NEED EVERY PRAYER OUT THERE POSSIBLE PLEASE!!!! I am not a person that posts personal matters on Facebook, only thing I share a lot is about stress in school or my happy relationship. But what a lot of people don’t know is my home life. Everyone on here probably thinks I am privileged, spoiled, or rich. In reality I am not. During High school I was honored for my father to switch me his GI Bill benefits meaning I had practically an 80% full ride to further my education. By having these benefits I chose one of the best colleges ever in Texas, not a public institute but a Private institute. Since 80% is covered why not go big!

Once High School graduation night came around my father had driven in from his stationed area and attended my graduation. That night as we had went home to celebrate Continue reading “My Father’s Betrayal”

 

I Deserve Better

I recently shared a letter to my husband. After some contemplation, I thought perhaps my story could help others in a similar situation, so her it goes.

I was 18 years old when I joined the Army. No one would have guessed that I would excel in the military, but I absolutely loved it. When I left for basic training, I had been seeing a sweet guy who didn’t understand the rigors of boot camp. When I couldn’t call him everyday, he thought that meant I no longer cared. He moved on and met someone else. While at the time, this didn’t actually seem to be too big of a deal, not long after that he was killed in a car accident in which he had been drinking and driving. When we were together, I wouldn’t allow him to drink and drive and I spent a lot of time later on wondering what might have been.

I was in my fourth year in the Army when I met the man I would later marry. He was cool, confident and honestly a challenge. I met him at an Army training event. He was a soldier too and at that point in my life, I had found that men who didn’t know that lifestyle, didn’t take kindly to it. Continue reading “I Deserve Better”

 

You Will Never Trust Him Again

So your husband cheated on you and you have made the decision to save your marriage.  Perhaps it is because you love him so much.  Or maybe you are comfortable in your marriage, have children.  Whatever the reason is, you have decided to make it work, to forgive him.  To pick up the pieces of your life and try to move forward.

I am not here to tell you to leave your cheating husband, nor am I here to tell you it is not possible to move forward. The truth is, you can move forward.  You may even end up living a relatively happy life, but, and here is the but.  You will NEVER be able to trust him again.  Sure you will talk to others and they will say that trust has to be earned and eventually you will be able to trust again. That sounds good Continue reading “You Will Never Trust Him Again”

 

Read Her Letter To Her Cheating Husband Here

Homewrecker,

First I want to say that I am not expecting you to care or even begin to grasp what I have to say in this letter.  The one question that keeps haunting me is how could YOU do this to me and my girls?  I realize there isn’t a good enough answer, the fact is YOU did it.

Some people might say R & I set up the perfect storm by trusting YOU both. However, I will not accept that. There is something wrong with YOUR characters if opportunity controls YOUR loyalty.

YOU knew how much I loved him and what I went through for him and with him.  He wasn’t YOURS to take, but I am also aware YOU couldn’t take what he wasn’t willing to give away. Instead of him looking inside himself he took the route that was clearly EASY & CONVENIENT! Continue reading

 

Read Her Letter To Her Homewrecker

B,

In all the time that has passed I have come to realize that if you were able to keep secrets like you did for years & have a twisted loyalty to someone else, that you were capable of doing so much more for me as my husband & as a father. You simply didn’t want to.

You put your time and attention into someone other than me and our family. You robbed me of affection, attention, compliments & most importantly love, loyalty and the value that I deserved. Continue reading

 

30 Years Stuck

I’ve been married for 30 years and I don’t love my husband anymore.  I caught him on porn sites because I installed a program in my computer.  When confronted he lied and blamed it on our adult son. He was emotionally abusive. He was in an emotional affair several years ago, but to this date, he won’t admit it. He’s also a controller with money. He had a 5 weeks sexual affair February/March 2015 and tells me he wants a divorce. He “opened” up to the girl he had an affair with but my own husband won’t talk to me. What should I do?