Hello My story starts around 2009-2010. My husband began to hover over his phone a lot. I happen to see initials in his phone contact. I asked him who the person was. He said a guy from high school that he knew. I saw his phone one day while he was downstairs and I went to the contact and saw a woman in her bra and panties. The response from my husband shocked me even more as he told this mystery woman how he wanted to kiss all over her body. I was so upset that I confronted him. He told me that his friend had used the phone and it must have been a text to him. However as I thought about it, he lied. First, a pic of my husband and myself was sent to the woman and the woman replied “you are a married man” Second, his friend had not been over in a while. At that time he was somewhat convincing and I let it slide. From then on I started looking at his phone when I could and I would see vague responses from the same woman. She would send pics(clothed this time). Continue reading “My Trust In Him Is Shattered. . .”
I know it has been a long time, and if you have visited this site the past few weeks, you will have noticed most of my personal posts have been taken down. I have enjoyed blogging here for years. Some of you have followed me from my original wordpress blog, Shesahomewrecker.com, or this blog. The women I have met throughout the years, have been such a huge emotional support to me and I will be forever grateful. My blogs have provided my thoughts, feelings and emotions a place where I was able to find a sense of normalcy and sanity, in my times of devastation.
I don’t know what is going to happen with this blog. I will keep it up for a while and continue to take reader submissions. Hey, I may keep it up forever. But my time blogging here about my personal life, has come to an end. My life has changed drastically over the past few years, and I can finally say Continue reading “This Will Be My Last Post. . .”
I feel very sad to say that I’ve become an infedility expert. My husband has had multiple Texting/FB/Phone affairs. He swears none of them were physical. I’m still healing from this last batch and it’s been extremely difficult. He met up on 2 occasions at a hotel with a woman he knew growing up (she came to our hometown from 300 miles away to see him!), at the same time he was having another “relationship” with a 23 year old employee of his (we are almost 40!), and also he was engaging in an online relationship with a woman in a different country. Cybersex, texting…all that. Even coming home in the morning after spending 2 different nights with the one woman, swears nothing physical happened. I don’t nor will I ever believe him.
As the lies piled up over the course of 3 months while these 3 separate affairs were going on, I learned a lot that may help other women in a similar situation. Please don’t ever blame yourself for someone else’s betrayal. No matter how much blame they try to throw your way, they made the choice to cheat. Don’t let them make you feel like you are inadequate in any way. Which brings me to my second piece of advice, LOVE YOURSELF! Continue reading “He May Not Be Able To Love The New Me. . .”
“I just want to be happy.”
I didn’t hear that from him, in fact, he and I have never spoken about it. However, I did see a private message between my husband and his brother right after we separated. His brother asked him if he was happy, he replied, “very, very happy.” Well, this was my husband’s whole premise to have an affair. The premise is simple: I am not happy in my work, my home, my marriage but I will be happy if I can be with Sharon. Typically, he believed that when freed from our marriage he and she will develop a new and blissful relationship with each other. All the problems in the world will cease to be, and they will live happily ever after with no repercussions from family, friends, children, grandchildren… Well, he has the new relationship, but is he really happy? Is she? Am I? Is her husband? Are her children? Are our children?
Let me make this clear….Sometimes a marriage should end. For example, it may be necessary to leave if a spouse or child is in danger. However, like mine, most of the departing spouses are not seeking safety; instead, they pursue an anticipated different life in which a new lover will make everything wonderful. However, in reality, the belief is a delusion. Unfortunately, for most of the cheating spouses, their anticipated “happily ever after” eventually evolves into “what was I thinking?”
More than seventeen years into our marriage, I learned about the first affair. And in typical fashion, he believed that she was the answer to all his problems. But, he claimed it was just a texting affair, that he hadn’t stepped over that line, that he wasn’t even actually having an affair it was just….just…. “Two troubled and depressed people talking”. He called an end to it. Over, she meant nothing. One year later, caught him AGAIN, with her, texting, he still claimed it wasn’t sexual. Guess what, he “ended it again” that was a lie, also it became sexual. It became “a relationship/affair”.
A Faulty Assumption Continue reading “New Life, Ex Wife. . .Part 2”
I used to go by “anonymous”, then I grew into “anonymous no more” on a Betrayed Wives Club website. Now I am ME, Cyndie Bryant. How did it get to here?
On the last day of September 2016, I looked at my husband’s tablet and saw these words, “I Miss you Mark,” “I Miss you too Sharon,” “I Love you Mark,” “I love you too Sharon.”
Well, since my name is Cyndie I knew this wasn’t me! (Sarcasm -101). My husband of 20 years, had been having a three-year affair (oops, she wrote that in one of her messenger tests herself) with another women. Another ALSO married women. Three years ago, I caught him having an emotional affair, or on-line affair as he called it with this same women. He and she were texting each other, first on Facebooks messenger (she sent him a late night text that said, “I’m back”. I asked him where she had been!) He claimed it was simple flirting, he’d stop immediately. Then a few months later, there she was again, this time on the cell phone I bought him as a surprise birthday gift (it took me a few months to “catch on”). His son worked with him at the time and was teasing him about who he was texting so much….of course, he was told “Cyndie, who else”? Texting back and forth 1700 times in July, 2000 times in August…..and it went on and upwards until I caught them in January by seeing the phone bill (yes, I have the originals). He tried to lie, saying it was some male friend of his that liked to send porn back and forth. Well, it was a “friend” all right, her name was S Sinclair. I finally dragged it out of him and verified that it was her cell phone. Continue reading “New Life, Ex-Wife Part 1. . .”
A little back story. I’ve been married once before to a very honorable man who literally saved my life my giving up his during a natural disaster in our city. We tried to have children by doing EVERYTHING scientifically possible. After he passed, I met my current husband when he moved here to help clean up the city. It took me a while to get comfortable with the idea of dating him, but he was persistent. I finally agreed and our connection was very strong. We were great partners when it came to everyday living. We problem solved together without even talking, we had amazing chemistry in the bedroom. We went on a cruise together and that’s how we came home with a little stowaway. I was pregnant! I never thought I could have children, ever. We weren’t married, and I did not pressure him to stay. I actually looked him dead in the eye and said, “I will be an amazing single mom if you want out.” Instead of leaving which is what I partially expected, he grabbed my hand and told me he wasn’t going anywhere. So I looked to God and thanked him for sending me such a great man and for giving me the ability to create a child in my womb. We got married when our daughter was 18 months old and had our second daughter right before she turned 3. This is when things started getting weird.
He became distant, almost like he had a grudge against me. If I asked him to do a simple gesture for me he would purposely not do it because I asked. When I had our 2nd daughter he was there physically, but not with his heart. Now to the cheating incidents. Yep, that’s plural. Continue reading “I Don’t Know What To Do. . .”
You have sung my life. For years you knew everything I was going through and helped me heal. . .at least for the moment. I relate to you in a way I cannot relate to my best friend. I too, am in love with a man who cheats. I too, have stayed. I loved him too much, yet somehow, it was never enough.
I’ve packed his shit with “Irreplaceable” blasting in the background. I’ve smashed his car with a softball bat while “Lost Yo Mind” was in the distance. “Resentment” was on repeat for weeks and I felt every single word and found myself overcome with emotion. “Poison” stung, I knew he was my poison, I knew he wasn’t good for me, but I kept coming back, wanting more. I justified staying with “Ring The Alarm” because there was no way in hell I was going to let any other bitch have him. Not on my watch, not when I have invested years of my life into this man. I was also, “Crazy In Love” with him. With each album you released, I listened to you sing the story of my life.
I have spent over 10 years with a man who loves me in the best way, the only way, he knows how to love, but he cheats. He is irretrievably broken. He is incapable of real love, Continue reading “Turning Heartbreak & Betrayal Into Lemonade, My Open Letter To Beyonce. . .”
Valentines Day is less than a week away. Instead of boxed Valentine’s for your kids class, why not try these super inexpensive easy Homemade Valentines! These are great for your kids to bring to school. Just have them sign their name on the back!
Today is Super Bowl Sunday. Will you be trying to keep the kids entertained during the big game? Check out these free Super Bowl Bingo Printable cards for a little extra excitement. Use skittles, m&m’s, crayons, or whatever you have around the house for markers. Offer a little prize for the winner. This will be a lot of fun for the kids, but adults can have fun with this too! For the free download click here! Enjoy the big game!
I came across this video on Facebook yesterday and happened to watch it. It is only a few minutes long but something you should watch alone first, and then watch with your children. I was home with my 8-year-old son and his friend and we watched this together. We then discussed bullying. Yes, they’re only 8, but I felt as though they are old enough to understand, and old enough to experience the “shock factor”. Continue reading “STOP and Watch This With Your Children NOW. . .”